Learn How to Build a Relationship with a Man and Stop Him Pulling Away
3 Things a Man Wants In a Woman – No matter what their Starsign is!
How much time do you spend trying to figure out how to build a relationship with a man? Are you driving yourself nuts attempting to work out what the man of your dreams really wants?
OK, so it helps to learn about the personality traits of his starsign. It helps to learn about his likes and dislikes.
However, unless you pay close attention to what I am about to tell you, then you could STILL GET IT WRONG!
Find out what pushes a man away
What I am about to say may shock you…but did you know that no man is looking for the perfect woman?
No, he really is NOT looking for the perfect woman!
Let me explain the three things he wants from you…
But first, before we get into how to build a relationship with a man, let’s take a look at YOU.
How much time do you spend making yourself look sexy and attractive? You take care with your clothes and makeup. Do you constantly agonise over what to wear on a date?
In addition, how hard do you work at presenting yourself as a fun, interesting, independent woman who is not at all “needy”?
Let me tell you that your whole attitude towards him is based on some unhelpful assumptions and it is time to put you straight!
So you work so darned hard at being who you think he wants you to be. Then you are surprised that this man in your life just takes you for granted.
Sometimes do you wonder if he even notices you at all?
Which means that you try to convince yourself:
- It’s probably because he’s immature and needs to grow up a bit
- He’s been hurt in the past and he’s scared of being hurt again
- His job is stressful
- He is worrying about money
- His Ex is making life hard for him
And so on and so on.
Or maybe … (standby for a lightbulb moment!)
… is it simply because you’ve been doing all the work for him?
Does giving a man space work?
You can give him all the space you think he needs. However, unless you are able to accept the following fact, giving him space won’t be the answer. You will probably lose him anyway.
FACT: what men value the most are the things they have had to work hard to get
This means that if he doesn’t have to work hard to capture you and your heart, then he won’t value it.
Think about it for a moment. Which would you value the most?
A training completion certificate, you were awarded after attending a two day course?
Or the University Degree Certificate that was awarded after three years of hard slog, when you were always broke and struggled to get up for 8am lectures?
You may think that how to build a relationship with a man involves handing him the perfect girlfriend.
Err… this does not work because he will take her for granted.
He won’t value her as much as if he’d had to chase and woo her for weeks just to get her to go on their first date. THIS is why playing hard to get works.
However, as you’ve probably also discovered…
Playing hard to get works well while the chase is on. But once the chase is over, what then? Is it “game over” once he thinks he has won you? Does he start to think about the next challenge?
Aries Man enjoys the chase – but so do all men!
Aries Man in particular is well-known for loving the chase. He enjoys the chase but once it is over, he may well disappear to go after the next challenge.
However, if his intended has been hard to get AND providing he can feel he is her hero, then his woman will become his partner for life. I have seen exactly that happen recently with a couple I know.
(Did I just mention the word “hero”? Yes. Read on to discover why.)
An Aries Man I know had to work very hard to win over his partner. She is strong and independent. However, like most women, she has her vulnerabilities. She is not needy but she because has accepted his help, he is totally committed to her.
What does a man want from a woman he loves?
Relationship coach James Bauer has many women coming to him for help with how to build a relationship with a man they have fallen for.
However, some were complaining about guys who were blowing hot and cold. Everything would be going great, something would change overnight and then he would start to pull away.
A guy who had been warm, affectionate and interested would suddenly become distant.
Men who blow hot and cold
I know all about the man who blows hot and cold because I was in that position with a Libra once.
I am a Gemini. As a fellow Air Sign, Libra is meant to be one of the best matches for Gemini. But it did not work out that way for me.
I never did find out what the problem was (not until now, that is). One minute he would be desperate to be with me, then the next he was changing plans.
And this would happen in the space of a few hours!
Then, after it was over, I watched as he did exactly the same to every woman he dated after me.
Heck, I even found out recently that he had separated from the only woman he actually married just a couple of years ago. And he is now back chasing another woman that he dated more than 20 years ago!
What do you do with a man who says he loves you, then pulls away?
Wanting to help his clients, James Bauer started to look into this very male behaviour pattern.
What he discovered made sense of everything.
How to build a relationship with a man – according to James Bauer
James Bauer realised why these men were backing away. He knew what they needed… and what they weren’t getting.
Stand by for a shock!
Bauer discovered that it was not that there was anything wrong with these women. It all came down to something he called “The Hero Instinct”.
This means that most women do something that drives many men away… and they don’t even know they are doing it!
What makes men pull away?
The majority of women are naturally caring. Evolution made them that way.
Men evolved to be the Hunter Gatherers. They protected their women and children.
Women evolved to take care of their men and their children.
Look at YOU for example. I bet you are always there for your man. You look after him. You always make time for him.
Admit it – you would do anything for him, wouldn’t you?
Yep, been there, done that! However, we never get that, while we are doing something that is perfectly natural to us…
… we’re actually taking something away from him. We’re taking away his purpose.
Men want to be Heroes!
You see, your man wants to be your hero – good old Evolution has seen to that too.
He does not want YOU to be HIS Hero!! HE wants to be YOUR Hero
Don’t men love heroes? Look at how many grown men are still fascinated by Marvel comics and Superhero movies.
Every man on Earth, right from his early days, has dreamed of growing up to be the kind of hero who would save the world – and of course the majority dreamed of getting the girl at the same time.
Why do you think boys love dressing up as Batman, Superman, Spiderman, The Hulk?
Let’s be realistic here! Most men don’t get to put their world-saving dreams to the test in their 9-5 jobs.
Their lives don’t call for them to rip off their business ties and shirts inside a phone booth and leap into action, revealing their Superman side.
Maybe they can’t save the planet. But they can still get the girl, can’t they?
An ordinary guy with the heart of a Superhero finds getting the girl a worthy challenge. It takes Superhero confidence. Superhero charm. Superhero immunity to pain. Now, all he needs to find is …
…the girl who needs a hero!
Do You Need a Hero?
Let me guess… you don’t think you do!
Since we got the vote, us women have flouted Evolution. No more will we allow ourselves to be conditioned to need a man to save us. We are quite happy to save ourselves these days aren’t we?
So convinced are we that independence is the way to go, that we raise our daughters to be even more independent than we are.
You’re strong. You are independent. Leaky faucet? No problem. You can change the oil in your car. You can change a wheel.
Heck, you can even renovate a house single-handed – I did!
YES – you can take care of yourself! But it does not make you “needy”.
If you need help, it does not make you “needy”!
As for any man in your life, you have a lot to offer. You’re generous. Kind. Loving. Giving to a fault. Most important, you are NOT NEEDY!
All you want is to find a man who will appreciate everything YOU have to give HIM.
Is it any wonder Heroes don’t show up in your life?
That’s why, instead of attracting a Hero, you’ve ended up with so many Takers instead. Guys who take everything you are freely offering. Then they leave you hanging, high and dry.
If you want a hero, then you need to advertise for one.
How to build a relationship with a man – 3 ways you can invite a Hero into your life, starting today
#1 Tip on how to build a relationship with a man
Ask a guy for help
FACT: Guys like to help “Damsels in distress”.
It’s not that they want to feel superior, it’s just that want want to feel needed. And no, that does not make you “needy”!
Ask him for advice on buying a new computer. Desktop or Laptop? How much RAM do you need? And so on.
Tell him you are worried about that strange rattling noise that’s started up in your car. Ask him if he would mind having a listen.
Ask him to get something down from the top shelf.
How about asking him to help you with some decorating?
Then thank him warmly, with a great big smile of appreciation. No, that is not needy. It makes you someone with space for a man in her life.
#2 Tip on how to build a relationship with a man
Take pleasure in male company
FACT: Guys love women who appreciate men for just being men.
So what if his apartment is a shrine to sports or gaming?
If he spends hours on his fantasy football team? So what?
So what if his idea of a clean shirt is the one with the fewest wrinkles?
#3 Tip on how to build a relationship with a man
Let him earn your respect
FACT: Superheroes love challenges.
Men don’t want to be given a gold medal just for showing up. They don’t want your love handed to them on a plate. They want to earn it.
If there’s one thing men crave even more than a woman’s eternal enduring love: a challenge. This means that you need to give him opportunities to prove himself.
You don’t have to do the work of winning him over. Sit back, relax and allow him the pleasure of winning your admiration.
Don’t stop here! Keep Learning!
If that sounds like fun to you, click here to watch a video presentation about this relationship enhancement tool.
It’s something you can learn once, but then use for the rest of your life.